Iwas going to to do a glib entry on madness today but its gonna have to wait..
K is in pain, Her marriage was a unbalenced arrangement where her own life was dissolved until she became an extention of her husband, his ideals became hers, his desires were hers, her wants and needs were dissolved.
K has just told me that she now feels she is in the same situation with me...
this is terrible.
I dont want or need to subdue anybodies character, I dont want someone to agree with me. I want us to be two people who want to be together we dont need to be in step all the time, we can love each other and still like different stuff.
I want K to love herself not just me, she says all the things she has achieved are as nothing, she just went back to colllege this year after 20 years away and got distinctions all the the way through the year (even being nominated for student of the year)
but she still feels small and insignificant.
I dont want to be her sun, I want us both to be planets in the same orbit.
Please read naked-desire so she knows She is wonderful. Ilove her but I dont need to control her.
I promise to write about madness tomorrow