the boy child gets a modem
so my mum has bought N a modem so he can "use the internet for homework" like thats gonna happen I'm gonna install it today with dire warning that I can read "the log file" to see if he has been "porn-ferreting".
The log file doesnt exist but he doesnt know that (yeah I know about temp files etc) which I suppose is a bit rich coming from the man who caused his mums catalogue to fall open on the lingerie pages by default when he was an adolescent.
I also realise I'm lying to the boy child, but there is a family tradition of this. My mum told me that Bananas were imported into the country straight and could not be sold until they had been shaped and bent in the "banana processing plant"
She also told me that shouting "BOO" to a guinea pig would make its eyes fall out. This thought terrified me so much that I was still tiptoeing past their cages until I was 25!