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now then at the request of animamea I shall try and do a translation of "britspeak"

wee bairns

scottish term for sprogs,ankle-biters or small children


nowt, nil, zero,


goosed, fubar'd, broken, busted

Do you know I really cant think of any other ambigous words in my diary, it all makes sense to me, please leave me a note with any words that fogumerate you. (and yes this is just another plea for piles of your notes, I just like it when people write to me).

We saw an interview with Lenoard Cohen on tv the other day, I have spent lots of time listening to the mans records but had never seen him on tv before just talking.

He is such a coool dude, the woman interviewing this 60+ year old man was no young impressionable kitten, she was a mature woman of the world. despite this within 5 minutes you just knew that if he wanted her, he could have her. you could practically hear her gusset getting damp.

Mr Cohen smiled often and seemed like he was perfectly content with his lot.

todays revelation

I have never eaten food out of a microwave without losing a portion of the roof of my mouth, microwave food has two quantum states.

1, runny round the edges with a frozen lump in the middle state.

2,superheated, super agitated "live steam under pressure" state.

and because we only use microwaves when either in rush or very hungry and cannot wait for "normal" food to cook, a burnt gob is a given


laughing tackle, big hole just below conk

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