its getting better all the time
2003-02-22

My mind is dry of creative juices � as dry as a witches chuff� as the saying goes. I may resort to the default conversation of the English��

�The weather is very nice today�

Hmmm, that didn�t last very long did it?

K has gone to see her mum. I�ve gone to see a PC and monitor listing wonky servers.

I can see 12 TV aerials on surrounding houses (vertically polarised for the geeky-peeps) each one greedily hoovering dross from the ether.

I used to work on a street that was used a lot by the BBC to film �period dramas� you know the sort of thing, all corsets and top hats. We always knew when filming was about to happen because a man in a cherry picker would arrive in the morning and remove all the TV aerials from the roofs. Then a wagon would arrive and tip tons of horse poo into the street that was raked over to hide the tarmac and yellow lines painted on the road.

Once the filming was over all the toffs who lived in the street would run outside with buckets to get the horse poo to put on their roses.

I want my feelings back, I want to feel happy and vibrant, I want to be overwhelmed with lust, giddy with excitement.I want to care about things and feel I can influence them. I�m trying REALLY REALLY hard to be positive but going to work keeps knocking it back out of me. I think a period of leave is called for. The longer I spend at home the better I start to feel, I�m therefore extrapolating that a good bit of time off can only help.

It�s a super-double bonus idea, coz If I do the house husband thing, I can take some load off K, I can get better and the pair of us can get back to where we used to be. Where I want to be, where I long to be.I just hope I haven�t broken it forever.

And if you have read this could you be good enough to read it again a little later, coz if I get 46 hits today I will reach 10,000 on my stats thingy.

Ok so that�s cheating, you could refresh it and get your partners to read it over your shoulder!

I�m such a diarypimp